


Expect The Unexpected

by Rivermoon1970



Category: Criminal Minds, NCIS
Genre: Anal Sex, Blow Jobs, Canon Divergence, Eventual Happy Ending, Grief/Mourning, Hand Jobs, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Running Away, Slash, Slow Burn, confusing feelings
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-02-12
Updated: 2017-02-12
Packaged: 2018-09-23 19:58:37
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 18,707
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9673811
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Rivermoon1970/pseuds/Rivermoon1970
Summary: Weeks after Haley's death, Aaron was still having a hard time. He just needed a night away from everyone and everything, to just hold on and push down on those emotions. He did not expect to see one Leroy Jethro Gibbs, and he did not expect how one night could change his whole life. He just didn't know what to do about it, and when things got even more complicated, he ran and started a whole new life. He didn't expect it when his old life came crashing in one day and he had a choice to make, keep running, or learn to deal with it.





	

**Author's Note:**

> beta'd by: DarkJediQueen

Hotch was sitting in a dark corner of a bar he had never been to before. He just wanted to get away from the team because their looks of concern, and what he took to be pity, were pissing him off. When he looked up again, he saw Leroy Jethro Gibbs standing by his table. 

“Gibbs, what are you doing here?” Aaron knew he sounded gruffer than he meant to, he came here because he didn’t want to see anyone, especially anyone related, no matter how tenuous, to work.

“I come here pretty often, but I’ve never seen you here Hotch.” Gibbs slid into the booth without invitation. He had seen the news reports, even though no names were disclosed at the time, it was not hard to make out who it was on the television. Jennifer Jareau was good at deflecting the media, but Gibbs was just as good at his job as the BAU. It did not really take a profiler to figure it out if you knew all the people involved personally. Gibbs's heart ached for the man sitting across from him, though he had tried not to show it. He knew all too well the pain that Aaron was going through.

“I just needed,” Aaron frowned into his glass, swirling the amber liquid around before he took a sip, “To be alone,” Aaron said sternly to Gibbs, giving him one of his famous glares hoping the man would take the hint.

“Not gonna happen.” Gibbs saw the raw pain through the glare. He knew all about hiding behind a mask, and he immediately saw through Aaron’s. Oh he smiled a lot, but it did not always reach his eyes. It was a mask that he had perfected over the years to keep others at arm’s length, and he had a feeling that’s what the Hotchner Glare was designed to do. 

“Jethro, please just...“ Whatever he was going to say was cut off by the other man.

“Hotch, I know, okay. I  _ know _ .” Gibbs sat back with his own glass of whiskey, swirling it around the glass, he let his mind wander in memories of the wife and daughter he lost so long ago.

“Jethro? What are you talking about?” Aaron couldn’t say that they were good friends, but they were friends enough that Aaron knew most aspects of Gibbs's life, but he never heard anything about this.

Gibbs took a long swallow of his drink, “I wasn’t married three times Hotch, I was married four.” He looked at the table for a long moment, cocked his head to the side and spoke quietly, “Her name was Shannon. She was everything to me.” He took a deep breath and let a little of the pain seep through that carefully crafted mask.

“What happened?” Aaron furrowed his brow not really knowing why he wanted to suddenly know what he could tell Gibbs was holding back on.

“She had witnessed a drug deal go down on the base. She reported the Marine involved, and described the dealer. She was going to testify in a trial against the dealer.” Gibbs took another long swallow of his drink, “She and my daughter were in the car when the Agent that was protecting them was killed causing an accident that killed them both.” 

Aaron closed his eyes letting a tear leak through. “Oh my god, I’m so sorry Jethro.” He looked over at the man on the other side of the table in sympathy, but not pity which Gibbs was grateful for.

“I have never truly gotten over it Hotch,” Gibbs said quietly.

“I don’t think I would have survived it if Foyet took Jack also,” Aaron hadn’t meant to make that confession, but he felt the truth in those words. He wouldn’t have survived if he lost Jack, as well, and it’s made him a little over-protective of his son. 

“You have to let it out Aaron. I’m a walking example of not letting go, don’t be like me Hotch.” Gibbs said quietly, unsure of why he had confessed even this little bit to the man across from him.

“I don’t have the luxury of giving in. Jack is only four, and he needs me.” Aaron tried to calm the raging storm inside him, but it was difficult to push down those emotions, and not let himself feel them. He was just glad that Jessica was watching Jack for him this night, or he would never have indulged like he was at the moment, but he had needed to get away, away from everyone he knew. Of course, that didn’t quite work out quite like he had planned.

“Would you like to get out of here? Come back to my place. It’s quieter and you don’t even have to talk.” Gibbs was not really sure what he was offering, but the words were out of his mouth before he could analyze them.

Aaron watched the other man for a minute, trying his hardest not to profile him, before he made his decision. “Okay, sure.” He had no clue to what he was really agreeing to, he was not sure what he was even doing, but he did want to get out of the bar. It was becoming noisier, and the later crowd was coming in filling the place up. That defeated the purpose of him sitting in a quiet corner if the place ended up crowded. So, before he knew it he was following Gibbs back to his place. 

Gibbs let Aaron in, and they made their way down to the basement where Aaron saw the current incarnation of a boat that Gibbs was working on.

“You build boats?” Aaron looked surprised when he looked over at Gibbs.

“Yup.” Was the only answer Aaron got from the silver haired man.

“I may not be a mechanical engineer, or a genius like Reid, but how exactly are you going to get it out of here?” Amusement colored Aaron’s voice as he looked quizzically at Gibbs.

“Don’t know. Haven’t finished it yet.” Gibbs gave Aaron a small smile.

Gibbs had taken a mason jar with nails and dumped it out and poured some whiskey in it. Then he took a mug that was sitting to the side of his workbench, blew on it, and poured some more of the whiskey in that one, then handed it to Aaron.

Aaron just quirked up a brow at Gibbs as he took the offered mug, a slight bit of amusement shone through the mask of pain that he was currently wearing. Aaron took off his jacket, and tie throwing them on the stair banister, not really caring that his Armani suit was currently collecting fine bits of sawdust. He moved next to Gibbs, and sat on a stool, took a sip of the whiskey, and closed his eyes. He was indulging in the fact that Gibbs was not exactly a very loquacious man, and that he was just offering a comforting presence. He thought that if the NCIS agent were to say anything at that moment he would break, and that was the point of this whole evening, holding himself together long enough that he would not break. He needed to be strong for Jack, but he had no one to be strong for him. Oh, the team was there, and as much as they tried none of them understood, not really. Not even his best friend David Rossi. 

Gibbs just leaned back into the workbench at his back and let Aaron sit there in silence. He suspected that this is what the FBI agent needed more than anything. After a few minutes, he picked up one of his hand tools and moved to a particular section of the boat that took up most of the floor space. He was working on refining the wood, carefully bringing out the inner grain by using the softer side of the chisel. He was also working on the slots for the cross pieces to be placed in later. His preferred method of building was the peg and slot style. It lasted longer and a minimum of nails needed to be used which let the natural beauty of the wood come through. Every once in awhile he would look back to see Aaron staring into his mug fighting against the storm of emotions that Gibbs could see being played out over the FBI Agent’s face.

Aaron watched Gibbs out of the corner of his eye and appreciated the sure, steady hands that were working on the boat. He put his mug aside and on impulse grabbed the hand sander that was sitting on the workbench. He took off his dress shirt, and threw it up with his coat and tie as he slowly circled the boat. He stopped at one section and feeling the wood he found a few planks that were rough. He started to sand using long slow strokes, applying gentle pressure. It felt good to stretch his muscles, to get lost in the mindless work, to let his mind go and not think for a change.

Gibbs watched for a moment, and only gave Aaron an approving nod. It was just like he would do so he let the man work. He knew all too well how lost he could get in something as simple as sanding down the wood. He liked how his mind would wander, and his thoughts would clear themselves out. Sometimes it was cathartic, sometimes it let him shut down and not think, and sometimes it was what he needed on an especially difficult case. After a while, he noticed that Aaron had a whole section finished, so Gibbs walked over and handed the man another chisel, and showed him how to bevel the edges like he wanted them.

“Here, use this side.” Gibbs put the tool in Aaron’s hand and held his hand over the wood, slowly stroking up, then flipping the tool to stroke back down to dislodge any rough patches and smooth the wood out. Gibbs was pressed up against Aaron’s side, and for a moment Aaron thought he should feel uncomfortable, but he didn’t. He felt Gibbs's warm breath on his neck, and a slight shiver went up his spine. He closed his eyes a moment as he tried to process just what he was feeling. He turned his head just a bit to look into the blue eyes staring back at him, his hand was still being held by Gibbs, and his palm began to sweat. Their breathing sped up a little as they stood there looking at each other as anticipation swirled in the air around the two men. Then just like that Gibbs broke off and moved away, and Aaron felt a mixture of relief and sadness at the loss of contact.

“Just like I showed you, long slow strokes with the rougher side up the wood, then use the opposite side to smooth it out.” For some reason though this explanation was doing something very strange to Aaron, he swallowed hard as he tried to control the shiver that ran up his spine. He went back to the work, but he wasn’t in the same headspace anymore. If anything his body was reacting to the loss of contact from just a moment before. Aaron looked up every so often to see those piercing blue eyes watching him. A picture formed in his head of what it would be like to kiss the Leroy Jethro Gibbs.  Aaron quirked up his brow at his own thoughts and swallowed hard.  He laid the chisel back down and strode over to the workbench, grabbed the whiskey, and downed it in one go. He knew his eyes were too bright, too open, but he just couldn’t help it. He felt the flush on his face as the tension in the basement increased with each breath that he took. Aaron had no idea what was going to happen, only that something was, and he had absolutely no clue to what he was going to do when it did.

Gibbs felt tension as well and tried to figure out what he wanted to do about it. This was not what he had in mind when he invited Aaron over. He truly wanted to just give the man a place to be silent, to let some of that tension he had been feeling in the bar go. But there was something here, and Gibbs wondered if it was born of their friendship, or their shared grief. Before he knew or could question what he was doing, he stepped up to the dark haired man and leaned against him. Aaron was loathe to push him away, and his breath become shallow as their faces were only inches apart.  Aaron closed his eyes expectantly as he leaned in closer, and just brushed his lips softly against Gibbs's own mouth. When Gibbs didn’t flinch, or move away Aaron cupped the back of his head and pulled him in those last few centimeters and kissed him deeply. When he pulled back he was surprised by his own actions, and the fact that Gibbs had not pushed him away.

“Jethro...” Aaron started to say, but was cut off as he felt rough hands wander under the t-shirt he was still wearing. When it was pulled off him he didn’t try to stop it. He waited, though, waited for the shock, the look of horror, or disgust that he often felt when looking at his own scar-riddled chest. He turned and bowed his head to the side, not wanting to see the look on Gibbs's face. When he felt a gentle hand slowly caressing him, he thought he was going to break apart right then and there.

Gibbs laid a gentle hand on Aaron’s face turning him so they were looking at each other.

“Aaron.” Gibbs almost broke apart himself seeing the look in Aaron’s eyes, the raw grief and the self-recrimination that he so often himself felt was reflected back at him. “Don’t do that to yourself Aaron. These don’t define who you are.” He started to caress each one running rough fingers gently over each scar. He only knew part of the story, but he had not inclination to press for explanations, he knew how private Aaron was, and would let Aaron keep his secrets.    
  
Gibbs did not try to stop McGee from hacking into the FBI database to get the files, so he could find out what actually was happening when he heard about the initial attack. Which he heard about from Fornell. Gibbs had been furious at the time that there was nothing he could do to help. But, here and now he knew he could comfort, and maybe help Aaron regain some of that confidence he could see slipping away moment by moment as they stood there together in a dusty basement.

A tear slipped out and Aaron was loathe to stop it. He hardly let himself indulge in any kind of vulnerability, but here and now, he was cracking. That normally stoic mask fell, and emotion flooded him as he felt cared for in ways he had not felt since Haley had left him. 

“If you want me to back off, let me know now. If not, let me help you, Aaron.” Gibbs waited patiently as his hands rested on his friend’s hips waiting for a reply. He didn’t have to wait long before Aaron was kissing him again, this time rougher, harder almost bruising as teeth clicked together. One arm was wrapped around Gibbs's waist pulling him in tighter as the other snaked up his back, his hand cupping the back of Gibbs's neck holding him there as he continued his assault on the NCIS agent's mouth. Someone moaned in the back of their throat and Aaron had no clue which one of them it was, but it hardly mattered, all that mattered was the hands on him gripping his back, hard. He knew there would be bruises later, which was not a major concern at the moment. He just wanted to feel something other than this crushing grief, and if he found it in the arms of Leroy Jethro Gibbs then so be it.

Gibbs pulled back after a minute and held out his hand and waited. Aaron took it without reservation, and was led out of the basement and upstairs to the bedroom.They each silently undressed, both men were no longer unsure of where this night was going. Gibbs walked to his nightstand and threw a bottle of lube and a condom on the bed before he pushed Aaron down and lay on top continuing their kissing from just a few moments ago. 

Aaron gripped Gibbs's hips and dug his fingers in hard pulling him closer wanting some friction against his aching cock. He threw his head back as Gibbs licked and suckled his neck, biting into the soft flesh causing Aaron to cry out and buck up against him roughly.

“God, Jethro.” Aaron was left breathless against the assault of Gibbs's lips and teeth. The man started to slide down Aaron’s body, biting and marking him as he went. He was careful not to leave any marks where anyone could see, but Aaron knew there would be bruises in the morning and again he just didn’t care. All he cared about at the moment was how Gibbs was making him feel.

Gibbs took his time as he licked and suckled at each scar, giving his undivided attention to each and every one, letting Aaron know that they didn’t matter. Aaron was gripping Gibbs's shoulders his fingers digging in as almost all his senses were being assaulted at once. He was feeling a rush of emotions, and it was overwhelming, but he didn’t want to stop.

Gibbs continued his assault on Aaron as he slid down even farther his tongue flicked over the other man’s belly button causing Aaron to gasp. Gibbs nipped at the tender flesh before sliding down even more. He looked up at Aaron to make sure the man was still okay and their eyes met and Gibbs saw such longing and desperation that it spurred him on. He wrapped his hand around the heavy cock in front of his face and slowly slid his hand up and down the silky sensitive flesh. There was a bit of pre-cum already leaking and Gibbs flicked his tongue across the head making Aaron quietly cry out and buck his hips almost involuntarily. When he felt the wet heat surround him as Gibbs took him in his mouth, Aaron let out a groan.

“Jethro,” he sighed, his voice rough from holding back. He fisted his hands in the silver hair as he tried to keep the other man right where he wanted him.

Gibbs took his time and slowly slid his mouth along Aaron’s cock, his tongue swirling around the head as he bobbed up and down. He applied more friction as he hollowed his cheeks and sucked harder. Aaron was slowly pistoning his hips almost involuntarily as Gibbs worked that sinful mouth on him. 

Just when he thought he was lost to all sensation of what NCIS agent Leroy Jethro Gibbs was doing to him Aaron felt a slick finger start to play with his tight entrance. He threw his head back as he felt that slick finger slid into him ever so slowly. Gibbs curled his digit just slightly and was rewarded with a shocked gasp from Aaron. He didn’t let up his assault as he slid in a second finger and slowly started to work his fingers in and out of the FBI agent. Gibbs was, thrusting those sure fingers in and out, and Aaron was bucking back against Gibbs's hand pleading for more.

Gibbs sat up and pulled his fingers from Aaron, much to the man’s disappointment, he quickly rolled the condom onto his own throbbing erection. He used some more lube to slick the condom a little more, and then when he was ready, he guided the head into Aaron’s slicked up hole. 

“Fuck,” Aaron cried out as Gibbs slowly worked himself inside and when he felt himself push past the tight ring he stilled for just a moment, letting Aaron get used to the intrusion.

“Oh god Jethro, move please,” Aaron pleaded with the man on top of him. Gibbs didn’t waste any time, he thrust in the rest of the way till he was balls deep. He grabbed Aaron’s legs and pushed them up to his chest and started to move. Slow gentle thrusts at first then after hearing the pleading in Aaron’s voice he sped up his movements. His goal was to undo the man under him a little at a time.

Aaron silently cried, he let the tears he had kept locked away all those long weeks slowly escape as Gibbs moved above him.

“Jethro, you don’t even know, oh god, harder please,” he pleaded as his hands gripped Gibbs's waist encouraging a faster pace. He slid his hands up Gibbs's back scratching his nails down as the pleasure rocked through him, his body begging for more, begging for release, and not just the physical kind. Aaron’s hands were once again at Gibbs's waist fingers digging in roughly as he was pounded into the mattress. He grabbed his own cock and started to pull in time to the pace set by Gibbs and before he knew it he was coming over their combined bodies.

Gibbs felt Aaron’s muscles contract around his own cock, that familiar pull on his balls and groin as his own orgasm built within had him stiling above his lover. 

“Aaron, fuck,” he moaned out as he came hard while he buried himself deeply once more. He thrust in and out a few more times, riding out his orgasm. Lowering himself he placed a gentle kiss on Aaron’s lips as arms were wrapped around him. 

Gibbs pulled out, pulled the condom off, knotted it, and went to his bathroom to dispose of it while he grabbed a washcloth and wet it with warm water. He went back to the bed after he had cleaned himself in the bathroom and offered Aaron the wet cloth. After they were both clean Gibbs settled behind the darker haired man pulling him in close. Only then, during this tender care did Aaron allow himself to finally break. When he felt those strong sure arms enfold him his emotions boiled over and he finally let the grief that he had been holding onto for so long go.

“That’s it Aaron, let it go, let it all out.” Gibbs kept up his mantra as he let the man in his arms fall apart. No shame, no recriminations, he knew this is what his friend had needed, but it broke him a little to see the strong, ever stoic Aaron Hotchner break wide open, and openly sob while he held on. It was a long time before Aaron started to settle, before his grief had slowed down. Gibbs had just laid several gentle kisses along his shoulders, letting his friend know he did not have to go through this alone.

Aaron finally fell into the kind of sleep his body had been desperate for, but every time he tried the nightmares came. He lived those last few moments of Haley’s life in his dreams over and over, and it kept a decent night’s sleep away. But not this night, this night his nightmares had been chased away by friendship and caring. He slept deeply for the first time in weeks, feeling safe for the first time in months, and Gibbs just held him through the night. 

He woke early to find he was wrapped around the other man, and he just couldn’t help it, he kissed that expert mouth gently, grateful for the care that he had been given. Gibbs woke to the feeling of Aaron’s mouth on his and before either man knew it they were once again moving together. When the orgasm ripped through him Aaron rode it out holding Gibbs close not wanting to break the contact any time soon. They fell back to sleep again, and neither man moved for several more hours.

* * *

Aaron woke to the smell of coffee and bacon. He contemplated for a moment the turn of events from the evening before, and he wasn’t quite sure how he felt. He thought he should be embarrassed by the emotional outburst, but he wasn’t. He felt like the wall he had been building to keep himself apart from everyone had crumbled. A part of him wanted to just lie there in bed and not see or speak to anyone. The depression he had been fighting so hard was just there on the edges of his mind. He was trying his damnedest to not give in to it. There was no luxury of giving in for him, he had to check on his son and Jessica. He also needed to go into the office, criminals were not going to take time off just because he was having a personal crises of faith. Shoring up the feelings of guilt and sadness was harder than he imagined it would be, but there wasn’t as much of a constriction on his heart anymore. He wouldn’t go so far as to say that he was healing, but he was now at a place that maybe, just maybe he could begin to move on.

Sitting up in the bed, Aaron pulled his legs up to his chest, and wrapped his arms around his legs. He had his head down and was trying to get control of the tide of emotions that threatened to break again. When he felt a hand on his shoulder he startled and looked up into piercing blue eyes.

“Here, thought you might need this.” Gibbs handed Aaron a mug of coffee and the agent almost sighed in relief.

“So,” Aaron started to say something, but he really had no idea what it was he wanted to say. He had always kept his vulnerability away from his friends and co-workers. They did not need an emotional unit chief, or so he assumed. The night before he had broken open with a friend, and he had no idea how to actually process the fact that he had sex with someone that was not Haley. 

“Are you okay?” Gibbs asked softly while he sat down on the bed in front of Aaron. He was not one to talk about feelings overly much, but Aaron’s vulnerability had shaken him a little. He wanted to make sure his friend was going to be alright.

Aaron sat back and drank some of his coffee contemplating his emotional state. He looked down into the mug a moment, he also found it difficult to share his feelings with others, and though he thought this should be awkward for some reason he actually found comfort.

“I’m...” He frowned and closed his eyes letting his head fall back against the headboard, “I’m not sure. Even though we were divorced...” Tears formed in his eyes as that wellspring of leftover emotions flooded him. Guilt was the first and foremost feeling. “I should have protected her Jethro, I should have gotten there faster, should have known right away...“ The silent tears fell and he had a hard time stopping the guilt that permeated his whole being. He was breathing heavy and his brows were furrowed in pain, deep emotional pain. He put a hand over his heart as his breath hitched, his cries once again breaking Gibbs's heart.

“Aaron, stop.” Gibbs grabbed one of Aaron’s wrists in an attempt to stop the rising panic attack that was starting to bloom. “Believe me I know all those should haves are going through your head right now, but you have to stop. It won’t do you any good and it certainly won’t do your son any good.” Gibbs held Aaron’s wrist in a tight reassuring grip as the man let go once again. 

After a few minutes Aaron calmed down enough to speak, “How can I protect Jack if I couldn’t protect Haley?” He looked at Gibbs with such uncertainty that it clutched at his heart.

“Aaron, all you can do is your best. Stop torturing yourself, it will get you nowhere. Concentrate on that little boy give him what he needs and I guarantee you’ll eventually be okay.” He held on till he felt Aaron had calmed down. Gibbs gave Aaron a tight smile as he got up and went back into the kitchen.

Aaron took a quick shower, Gibbs had left some towels for him and showed him where the personal products were. Standing under the hottest water he could stand, Aaron took a few deep breaths and gained more control over himself. He took awhile, indulging in the pounding heat on his back. When he finally felt ready, he turned the water off and stepped out, dried off, then dressed in his discarded clothes. After he settled a little more, he walked out of the bedroom to go find Gibbs. Originally, he was just going to grab his coat and tie and quietly leave, but the smell of cooking had him re-routing to find the kitchen.

“I have enough for the both of us,” Gibbs stated matter-of-factly indicating with his head that Aaron should sit and have something to eat.

Aaron sat down at the table and a moment later a plate was put in front of him. His stomach was in knots as he sat there unsure if he could actually eat anything, but he was going to try anyway.

“Aaron, do you need to talk about last night?” Gibbs sat with his own plate across from Aaron.

Aaron looked up and sighed, “No. Do you?” He asked a little awkwardly.

Gibbs gave him a crooked smile, “No. I just hope you don’t...“ Gibbs was about to say more when Aaron cut him off.

“Jethro, I don’t regret anything.” A look of understanding passed between them and neither man had to say anything more.

“Good.” They ate their breakfast in silence and a few minutes later Aaron was walking out the door so he could go pick up Jack and get him to his preschool on time. About an hour later he was pulling into the FBI building and heading into work. 

He was glad when he read the e-mail from Strauss that she was giving the team some down time. Their caseload had been heavy, and the strain was starting to show. He actually smiled when he heard the low cheering from his team after they read the e-mail he passed on. and was genuinely happy, though it meant paperwork and consult reviews, but after the last few weeks he knew his team was not going to have any complaints.

When he went home later that night after picking up Jack from Jessica’s he didn’t feel so heavy anymore. The grief was was still there, as was the guilt, but it was at least something he could live with.

That night after saying prayers with Jack and letting him talk to Haley, Aaron slept better than he had in weeks, even better than the night before. As he started to fall asleep, he thought of Gibbs and how strange it was to have let someone in like he had, but he wasn’t going to look too deep into it, at least not for the time being.

* * *

Aaron wasn’t sure what possessed him to call Gibbs after they got settled on the plane, but this case had gotten to him. How anyone could do that to their son, he would never be able to understand. It also brought up too many memories of his own childhood which he wanted to think about even less. 

“Gibbs.” The other man said as he picked-up his phone.

“Jethro, it’s Aaron.” Aaron was nervous and slightly blushing. Everyone on the plane was either sleeping, or doing something else, and the unit chief was trying to keep up at least a pretense of privacy.

“Hotch, how are you?” Gibbs had wondered over the last couple of weeks how the man was doing, and whether he would hear from him outside of work. He found he was drawn to the quiet enigmatic man, and had been on the verge of calling him, so it was a pleasant surprise when Aaron called first. 

“I’m sorry for calling so late, but I ah, I wondered if you would like to get a drink with me?” Aaron waited with bated breath to hear what the other man had to say.

Gibbs smiled his crooked smile and didn’t take long to answer, “I’d like that. Do you want to meet somewhere or go to the same place as before?” 

“Do you know DiMarco’s?” Aaron wanted something a little more upscale than last time, and he wanted some good whiskey as well. The case had left him feeling a little raw, and now he wanted something comforting.

“Yeah, are you far?” Gibbs wondered where he was calling from.

“We’re about a half-hour out. I just need to drop off some paperwork, then we can meet at about 8:30?” He had checked his watch to estimate how long it would take him.

“I’m wrapping some stuff up, so that sounds good. See you at 8:30.” Gibbs hung up and a slow smile spread across his face in anticipation of the night ahead.

Aaron hung up and put his phone away, closed his eyes and leaned his head back. His thoughts lately often went to that night several weeks ago when he let himself go for once, and he found himself craving that again.

After the plane landed, he quickly made his way to his office and put away the paperwork that a part of him was itching to just finish that night, but he decided that for once it could wait. 

He checked the time, and figured that he had just enough time to run home, clean up and change. He wanted out of his work clothes, but still wanted to look nice. He quickly showered and pulled out a pair of black fitted slacks, a dark blue dress shirt, and a casual jacket. He checked his watch and was out the door, hoping he was going to be on time. Pulling up to the bar, he looked again at the time and was pleased that he estimated correctly. Even though he was a bundle of nerves, he wrapped his confidence around him like a layer of armor. He smiled as he saw the silver haired man waiting for him.

“Hi.” Aaron let out the breath he had no idea that he was actually holding in..

“Hi.” Gibbs smiled back at Aaron.

Aaron turned to the bartender and ordered a whiskey neat. Neither man said anything till Aaron got his drink. and they were moving to one of the comfortable, private booths.

“How are you Aaron?” Gibbs asked as he sipped his drink.

“Some days are better than others.” He admitted, “Today was not a good one,” the smile on his lip was not quite reaching his eyes.

“Is that why you called?” Gibbs watched him for a moment.

“Cases with kids.” Aaron took a deep breath and frowned into his drink, “They always hit me harder.”

Gibbs grabbed Aaron’s hand and held it for a moment, “Tell me.” 

Aaron recounted what he could to Gibbs, telling him about a father who was using his son to initiate a dangerous choking game, and how the son had been a victim of long-time systematic abuse by the father. 

“I just don’t understand, I never have. We see cases with abusive parents way too much. I look at my son and I wonder how, how anyone could hurt their child.” Aaron took a long drink of his whiskey 

“I don’t know Aaron, I could never understand it either.” Gibbs watched and saw the crack in Aaron’s mask and knew that he was going to need more than just a drink. He would wait and let Aaron lead wherever this was going.

“That boy is never going to be the same. He was ready to end it all Jethro. I saw it in his eyes. His father had his hands around the boy’s throat and the kid…” Tears pricked at the corners of his eyes when he thought back to the case, “He looked resigned, he was ready. We stopped the father, but the kid, I don’t know if he’ll ever recover.” 

Gibbs took a moment to consider his words before he spoke again, “Aaron, you can’t let these cases in. I know what you see, what you’re team sees is far worse than anything I’ve been called out on. But, if you start letting that in, there’s no coming back from that.”

Aaron sighed as he looked down at his drink. “That’s exactly what I am always telling my team. We lost Gideon because he started letting too much in. I know I shouldn’t internalize, it’s hard not to when you see yourself in the victim.” He swallowed back another shot of the whiskey from his glass.

“Aaron?” Gibbs quirked his head to the side and waited patiently.

“Not something I usually talk about. My father was pretty much a drunken bastard that took his anger and frustrations out on me and my Mother. My brother escaped his brutality, but it sits between us. I love Sean, but I don’t know if we’ll ever be close.” He looked over at the man beside him for a moment. “I try to be so much better for my son. He deserves me to be better.” He closed his eyes and laid his head back on the booth and sat there trying to quell the doubts and uncertainties that lived deep within him.

Gibbs moved closer and surprised Aaron by grabbing the younger man’s chin. “Aaron Hotchner, never have any doubt that you are a good man and a good father. I see how much you love your son.” Their faces were only inches apart, and Aaron felt that same fluttering between them that he had weeks ago. It would only take him moving his face just so and he would feel those lips against his again.

Gibbs must have seen something in Aaron’s face because he closed the distance between them and softly kissed him. It was almost too gentle and it made Aaron want more.

“Jack’s with his aunt,” he started to say more when Gibbs pulled him closer and deepened the kiss. After a few minutes they broke apart, both men had need shining in their eyes.

“Yes,” Gibbs said before Aaron could actually ask a question. They got up from their table and Jethro paid the tab over Aaron’s protests. They trip to Aaron’s apartment did not take long, and the men were undressing each other before the door was even closed. By the time they got to the bedroom they were both naked and wanting. 

Gibbs had the younger man under him in no time. He moved with passion, and a bit of desperation as he tried to help Aaron chase away the memories of the case in a heated embrace. Holding the FBI agent by the hips he pounded hard, trying to chase away the memories. When he took Aaron’s erection in his hand and felt the orgasm pulse in his grip it triggered his own release, and he came on a strangled cry. Leaning down he kissed Aaron, his lips sliding seductively over Aaron’s. The two men just kissed for a long-time letting the heat settle between them. After a few minutes, Jethro collapsed next to his lover, and took a deep breath before rolling onto his side.

“We really have to stop meeting like this,” Jethro teased as he looked down at the other man’s face. “I think we have a problem.” 

“Oh? What is that?” Aaron gave him a crooked smile.

“I think we have something here Aaron I’m just not sure what it is.” He smiled as he softly caressed Aaron’s face.

Aaron took his time in what he wanted to say, “I don’t know either Jethro. I’m not sure if I’m ready for any type of relationship.” He had no idea what it was he had with the gruff and often difficult NCIS agent, but he knew he had come to value their friendship.

“I’m willing to wait.” Jethro leaned forward and slid a hand up to the back of Aaron’s neck kissing him deeply, a slide of his tongue across the younger man’s lips as he sought entrance. Aaron complied letting Jethro in, but unsure of what it was he was agreeing to.

A knock at the door startled the two men. “Expecting anyone?” Jethro quirked up a brow, then frowned by how quickly Aaron went into agent mode. He threw on some pants and a t-shirt, grabbed the gun he had yet to put away, and slowly went to the front door. The knock came again, and Aaron carefully looked through the peephole surprised by the person standing on his doorstep.

“Jessica, what’s wrong?” Aaron had put the gun to the side and opened the door to his ex-sister-in-law.

“He had a nightmare, a really bad one Aaron he wanted to come home.” Of course, Jethro would choose that moment to come out of the bedroom. Luckily, he had put on some clothes.

“Aaron?” Jessica was giving him a quizzical look. He had no idea if the look she was giving him was from shock, anger, or both.

“Um, Jethro this is Jessica, Jessica, Jethro.” He quickly introduced the two.

“Is this a bad time? Because I can take him back home.” She blushed as she looked between the two men.

Aaron closed his eyes and took a moment to calm himself down. “No, of course not, I’ll go get him.” He walked out to Jessica’s car to go get his son.

“So, how do you know Aaron?” She was trying to make an awkward situation less awkward.

“We’ve worked together here and there over the years.” He smiled unabashedly at her.

“You’re FBI?” 

“No, NCIS.” He gave her his most charming smile.

“Oh, well ah, I’ll just go now.” She walked outside to see Aaron gathering up a sleepy Jack. “Aaron I,” She had no idea what it was she wanted to say.

“Do we have to talk about this Jess?” He was blushing darkly at the thought of trying to explain what was going on.

“No, yes, I ah I don’t know. I just never really.” She swallowed hard trying to find the words to make the awkward situation less awkward, and was failing miserably. “You know what? I’m just going to go now. Um, have a good night Aaron.” She rushed to her car and drove away.

Jack stirred in his arms as he walked back to the apartment.

“Daddy?” He turned sleepy eyes to his father.

“Hey buddy, what happened?”

“I had a nightmahe.” Jack laid his head on Aaron’s shoulder.

“What was it?” They walked into the apartment and Aaron was taking the boy to his own bedroom.

“It was ‘bout Mommy and the bad man.” The sadness in Jack’s voice broke Aaron’s heart. He closed his eyes to school his emotions so his son didn’t see. 

“Do you want to talk about it buddy?” Aaron sat next to his son on the twin bed, brushing back the boy’s hair, he tried to soothe him so he could go back to sleep. Jack shook his head no and snuggled down under his Spiderman blanket, and was quickly back to sleep. Aaron stayed like that for a few more minutes before he left the room.

“Aaron I’ll just...” Jethro was about to say he would leave when Aaron pulled him into his arms.

“Stay,” Aaron whispered in Jethro’s ear.

“But, what about your son?” 

“It will be fine, please Jethro, stay.” The older man smiled and took Aaron’s hand and led him back to the bedroom where Aaron spooned behind him, holding him close. Soon they both fell asleep and kept the nightmares at bay for one more night.

* * *

Aaron and Jethro decided to try to meet each other for coffee every morning, except when Aaron was out of town on a case, then the NCIS Agent had to go it alone. Today was one of those alone days and he had to admit he grew used to the FBI agent and their talks, or sometimes they both sat there and did their own paperwork lost in their own thoughts. On occasion. Jethro would talk out a case with Aaron, especially if it was difficult or one he was having trouble get a bead on. It was nice, their friendship grew, and if there was the occasional dinner and sex afterwards, then it was just an added bonus. Jethro didn’t want to explore his feelings for the younger man, but he knew that at some point he was going to have to. It was with these thoughts running through his mind when he got off the elevator, walked towards his desk, and heard voices as he rounded the corner of the cubicles. His head whipped up, and he looked to see Aaron’s team there.

“Hotch,” Jethro used the nickname, unsure if anyone on his team knew about the two of them.

“Gibbs,” Aaron spun around, and held out his hand for a handshake. Jethro raised a brow but took the hand and shook it.

He noticed the three other men there watching and, were they analyzing this situation? Aaron saw Jethro’s expression then he looked over at his team, especially David Rossi who was giving Aaron a very interesting look.

“Dave,” Aaron warned.

“What?” Rossi smirked at his friend.

“Hey boss,” Tony ran over to the group.

“DiNozzo, what’s going on?” He gave Aaron a tight smile, telling him what the hell?

“Well, a case they are working seems to have overlapped with one we just got. Didn’t you get my text?” Tony looked over at his boss.

“DiNozzo,” Jethro just gave his second a withering stare.

“Right Boss, okay so we have one dead Lance Corporal Tyler Caine. He’s down in autopsy now with Ducky.” 

“And how does this relate to your case?” He looked towards Aaron, and the profilers did not miss the look that passed between them.

“We have five dead men in the DC area. None were military, but the signature is the same.” Aaron picked up his phone and dialed, “Garcia, are you patched in?” Aaron asked his analyst.

“Yes bossman just give me the word and I can take over,” Garcia piped over the phone.

“Okay, go ahead send the information.” Aaron stood with his arms crossed as crime scene photos came through, and were up on their big screen.

“Hey, how’d she... I mean I boosted our security, Boss I swear,” Tim McGee had surged out of his chair as indignation flashed across his face.

“Baby girl’s better, kid.” Morgan smiled at the agent.

“Focus McGee,” Jethro growled out. “Hotch.” The NCIS agent pointed to the screens.

Aaron tried not to let the wry smile show as he took his normal Unit Chief stance. “Each man was stabbed exactly eight times in exactly the same pattern. Reid,” Spencer waved a hand when the others looked towards the other FBI agents patiently waiting. “Has been trying to figure out the pattern. We don’t have much on the profile. As you can see each victim doesn’t hold to any type, their socio-economic statuses are all different, two were married, one was dating, and the rest were single. We may be dealing with a type of omnivore, but even that doesn’t fit. Now, we have a dead marine.” 

“Okay, time to go see Ducky, then Abby. We’ll see what they have and maybe they can get you more.” Jethro directed this towards Hotch.

“You lead Gibbs.” Aaron just tilted his head, acquiescing to the other man. The two men walked off towards the elevator leaving a roomful of stunned agents.

“Huh.” Dave looked towards the elevator dumbfounded.

“Did that just happen?” Morgan was frowning in confusion, and Reid was standing there trying to wrap his head around his Unit Chief giving control to someone else.

“What?” Tony looked towards the elevator as well.

“It’s just Hotch, he never gives in that easily. Usually there’s an unspoken battle of wills, he finally gets his way, and the other person backs down. He is very Alpha Male, and I’ve seen him intimidate the worst of the worst. That,” He pointed to the elevator, “Was weird.” Spencer quirked a brow as he stared. The normally loquacious genius was stunned silent.

“Well maybe Gibbs is just that much more intimidating,” Tony quipped.

The three FBI agents looked to each other and thought for a moment, “Nah,” They all said, “You’ll see.” Reid was bored as he strolled over to Tony’s desk looking at his movie memorabilia.

“Did you know that after Top Gun came out in theatres that Navy recruitment by young men went up over 500 percent? Also, the original raw footage of Apocalypse Now measures over 1,250,000 feet of film which is over 230 hours’ worth….” 

“Reid,” Two voices said at once.

“What? He was just getting interesting.” Tony’s eyes lit up at hearing the young man spout movie facts.

“Oh no, no don’t get him started,” Tim looked over at the two men.

“So, Reid is it?” Tony smiled his boyish smile and held out his hand.

“Ah, yeah Dr. Spencer Reid.” He blushed at the look Tony was giving him. He surprised himself when he took Tony’s hand and shook it.

“Now, that was weird,” Morgan said staring at the young genius.

“What?” Spencer glared at this friend.

“Nuthin’ pretty boy, nuthin’ at all.” Morgan tried not to smirk as he sat back against one of the desks.

“Well, Spencer, would you like to go get some coffee? Looks like the Boss is going to be a while, and it is lunchtime. I’d love to hear more obscure movie facts. Maybe I’ll even do my Sean Connery impersonation.” Tony did it again and smiled that adorable disarming smile.

Spencer blushed and was almost, but not quite oblivious to the flirting tone. He perked up at the thought of coffee, “I’d love some coffee. What they have here cannot be constituted as coffee. It’s more like some kind of horrible, bitter, water with floating coffee grounds. I don’t understand how you can drink it. You know what the most expensive coffee in the world is? The-”

“Kopi Luwak, the berries that are eaten by the Civet in South America. They eat the berries then defecate the beans. Yeah, I have a perverse fascination….” The two were moving off towards the stairs and out towards the front door.

“This is a very strange day.” Morgan shook his head as he sat there dumbfounded.

“What’s going on?” Emily asked as she approached the group. She and JJ had finally made their way to the NCIS bullpen.

“You just had to be here Em, you just had to be here.” Morgan handed her the file on the dead marine and wouldn’t elaborate.

* * *

 

Almost as soon as Aaron and Jethro entered the elevator Jethro stopped it when the doors closed fully. He advanced on the other man and kissed him hard as he backed him against the wall. The kiss was just this side of passionate, and needy as he slid his hands up the back of Aaron’s neck, changed the angle and deepened it. He knew he should stop, that if they continue neither of them would be fit for duty for the rest of the day, but he had missed Aaron more than he wanted to admit. 

“Missed you at coffee,” Jethro smiled crookedly as he finally pulled slightly back.

“Same here.” Aaron gave him the full Hotchner smile and it sent a very unmanly flutter through Jethro's stomach. Aaron pulled the older man to him and continued kissing him. His hands wandered to the waistband of Jethro's slacks, he rested his fingers there while his mouth was being plundered by his lover. His hands shook as he pulled Jethro's shirt out of his pants and slid his hands along the soft skin underneath. Pulling him in even closer Aaron changed their positions, and Jethro was pushed back against the elevator wall. He planted his legs on either side of Jethro's and started to grind against him. He slid his tongue along the NCIS agent’s mouth and Gibbs readily opened for him. Aaron licked his way inside the agent’s mouth, tangling his tongue with the older man’s, encouraging him to do the same. He was grinding himself against his lover, as his hands wandered down to Jethro’s waist pulling him impossibly closer. The friction between the fabric was making both men hard. Before Jethro knew it Aaron had dropped to his knees and was opening Gibbs trousers and pulling his hardened cock out of his boxers.

“Aaron,” Jethro was about to stop him when he felt that warm wet mouth surround the head of his cock. “Fuck,” He almost shouted. Aaron swirled his tongue around the head, tasting the bit of pre-cum that had leaked out. Slowly, he swallowed as much of the cock in his mouth as he could. Holding Gibbs against the elevator wall by his waist, Aaron proceeded to give Gibbs the best blow job he had, had in a long time.

Throwing his head back and closing his eyes in pleasure a moan escaped from Jethro's lips as he lightly started to thrust in and out of that willing mouth. When he looked down and saw the unit chief’s mouth stretch over his cock, Jethro was not sure how much longer he was going to last because the view was one of the hottest things he had laid eyes on in such a long time.

Jethro fisted his hands in Aaron’s dark hair and cried out, “Aaron, shit not going to last...“ He threw his head back once again against the back of the elevator, and on a strangled cry released down his lover’s throat. Aaron hummed in pleasure as he swallowed everything Jethro was giving him. He basked in the knowledge that he had made the Silver Fox come undone in an elevator at his own workplace. 

Aaron slowly stood, and once again took Jethro's mouth in urgent needy kisses. Jethro slid his hands down into Aaron’s trousers, and unzipping them he gripped the hard erection in his hand. Spitting into his hand, he looked into the lust blown eyes of Aaron Hotchner as he slowly moved his hand over the silky, hardened flesh. Aaron was already on edge and all it took was a few strokes and he was coming in Jethro’s hand. 

“Holy crap.” Aaron was panting as he leaned forward resting his head against Jethro's forehead, out of breath he bent down for a gentle kiss. It took a couple of moment for him to calm down. When he did he tucked himself back in as both men leaned into each other on rather shaky legs. Jethro pulled a handkerchief out of his pocket to clean up his hand.

Aaron pulled him in for another kiss and after another minute pulled away. “I really think it’s quite inappropriate to be making out like teenagers in an elevator during a case,” Aaron quipped. “But I just couldn’t seem to help myself.” He gave the older man one more kiss before letting him go.

Slightly out of breath, Jethro didn’t comment, but gave Aaron one of those crooked smiles of his. “I think it’s my turn to take you out Agent Hotchner.” Jethro moved to start the elevator again with a smile on his face. 

“Just tell me when Agent Gibbs, and if we aren’t on a case I would love that.” Gibbs smiled again as the elevator stopped on the floor with Autopsy. Jethro led Aaron into the room and surreptitiously threw away the soiled handkerchief.

“What have you got for us, Duck?” He asked as he rounded the corner and went to the sink to wash his hands.

“Ah, Jethro my boy, I was just going to call you.” The ME looked up from the body and saw the newcomer, as well as mussed-up hair, and very swollen lips. He kept his comments to himself as he cleared his throat.“I see you brought someone with you.” Ducky was giving Aaron an appraising look.

“Dr. Mallard this is SAIC Aaron Hotchner, FBI Behavioral Analysis Unit. Hotch, this is Dr. Mallard.” Gibbs introduced the two men.

“The FBI is involved in this case?” Ducky watched the two men carefully, and noticed the subtle shift in their bodies as they leaned slightly towards each other. He filed away all this information to ask Jethro about later.

“It’s an ongoing investigation. Serial murder, may I?” Hotch asked as he took a pair of gloves and put them on as he approached the body.

Ducky raised a brow and thought that this man was a bit like Jethro in his assumptions.

“Of course. As you can see there are eight stab wounds to the chest and abdomen area...“ Ducky was about to say more when Aaron continued.

“In a pattern, but you don’t know what the pattern is or what the shape of the weapon is. Can I get copies of your pictures and notes Dr. Mallard?” Aaron’s stoic mask was in place and he was in full unit chief mode.

Ducky looked over at Jethro who gave a short nod, “Of course, Agent Hotchner. I will gather everything and give it to Jethro when I’ve completed my autopsy.” He eyed the two men carefully noticing their body language.

“I have a rule Dr. Mallard. No inter-team profiling.” Aaron gave him a knowing look with a tiny smile. “We may be working closely together for a while.” The meaning was not lost on the Medical Examiner and he just gave his own small smile.

“Understood, Agent Hotchner.” Ducky rocked back on his heels, oh I am definitely talking to Jethro about this.

“Let us know when you know more Duck,” Jethro said as he steered out of Autopsy and back to the elevator. When they got in Aaron smiled at Jethro.

“No, keep your damn hands to yourself Agent Hotchner.” Jethro gave him a cheeky grin.

“I didn’t move a muscle Agent Gibbs.” Aaron quirked up a brow as he smirked at the NCIS agent.

“Un huh,” was all Jethro said as the elevator stopped and he walked out ahead of Aaron. The Unit Chief just shook his head and knew what Jethro was doing. Aaron didn’t mind this time as he was in Gibbs's house, it was no less than what he would do if Gibbs was on the sixth floor of the FBI building.

They walked into a well-lit clean forensics lab, and Aaron just raised a brow at the woman standing there, bouncing on very tall heels to music that would make even Morgan cringe.

“ Abbs!” The woman startled and turned around at Jethro’s voice. She grabbed a remote and turned down the music before she addressed her boss.

“Gibbs, how do you do that?” She frowned and pouted a little until she looked up and saw Aaron standing there with a stoic look on his face. His eyes betrayed his amusement at the two of them, though. “And who’s this?” She had a bit of a saucy tone to her voice.

“Abbs, this is SAIC Aaron Hotchner, FBI. He’s the Unit Chief of the Behavioral Analysis Unit. Aaron, this is Abby Sciuto, genius.” Jethro kissed her cheek before moving to look at what she had on her screen.

“So Mr. Mass Spec has been working himself to death on this Gibbs, here, look at this.” She showed him a blown-up picture of what was on the screen.

“That’s a composite polymer.” Aaron was looking closely at the picture. Both Abby and Jethro turned to him and stared in shock.

Aaron was studying the picture, not noticing the looks he was getting from the other two people in the room. “Where was this picked-up from Ms. Sciuto?” 

“Um, we ah found it embedded in the wounds,” her tone caused Aaron to look over at her, “How did you know what that was?” She stared dumbfounded at him.

“A case with a disgruntled Aerospace Engineer two years ago. He was using a carbon fiber blade as the weapon. Made it himself. It threw us off for a few days till Dr. Reid figured out why the stab wounds were cleaner than anything we had ever seen before. We had to have a crash course in the different substances that the Manufacturer’s he worked at used.” He explained. 

Aaron moved off to the side and pulled out his cellphone, “Reid,” he waited till Spencer answered.

_ “Hey Hotch I’m sorry we’re on our way back, we just went- _ “ Aaron raised his brow at Spencer’s apologetic tone.

“Reid, it’s fine I need you to come to the lab. Looks like the weapon was made of a composite polymer,” he whispered into the phone.

_ “Shit, I’ll be there as soon as I can.” _ Aaron hung up with Spencer and turned back to the two in the room.

“Hotch, what’s going on?” Gibbs glared as he moved over towards Aaron.

He took a while before answering. Walking over to Abby’s secondary computer he found an FBI login page on her computer. Not saying anything he logged into his FBI files. “Should I even ask why you have a database login to the FBI?” He gave Abby the full Hotchner glare and Abby ran behind Gibbs.

“I don’t think there’s a right way to answer that Agent Hotchner,” Abby squeaked as she peeked around Jethro’s side looking back at the Unit Chief.

Not saying anything he pulled up the case files in question and put them up on the screen.

“I know you understand about confidentiality as this case has not gone to trial yet.” He kept his voice even and measured as he continued to glare at the young woman.

“Aaron.” Jethro looked quite amused during the whole situation. “Fornell put that login page on Abbs computer. He sometimes uses it when our case's cross.” 

Aaron knew that was a total load of crap, but he was going to let them have their little deception for the time being. Later, when this case was over, he was going to have Garcia wipe their system and have a talk with Fornell.

“Okay here we are. Two years ago, seven men that had been part of Boeing’s engineering department at various times in their life were killed. The killer was stabbing them in the shape of the old Boeing star. We figured out that they had all known each other, and had conspired to have a co-worker fired. Daniel James had gotten himself involved in some industrial espionage. He was stealing designs from other companies, and when he was caught, he was fired, and the companies he stole from all sued him. He lost everything, job, house, family and money. He had a major psychotic break, and went after his colleagues that had found out about his activities and got him fired.” He let Jethro and Abby go through the files. 

“So, how do you think they are related other than the type of weapon used?”

“I don’t know, but it’s a bit strange.” Aaron was going to ask if Abby found anything else when he heard two voices.

“All I’m saying is that Star Wars has much better special effects and the underlying King Arthur story makes for a great adventure.” Tony is heard saying.

“Yes but Star Trek has better world building, actual scientific theories, and has inspired real world technology…”   
  


“Reid,” “DiNozzo” Two voices said at the same time. Both men turn toward their bosses and were contrite enough to blush a bit.

“Shutting up boss,” Tony said before Gibbs could come over and smack him on the back of the head.

“Sorry Hotch,” Spencer blushed as he walked over, studying the photo on the screen. “Ah, so this is why you think the case may somehow be related to James. Though this composite polymer has a bit of glass embedded in the material. I’m wondering if our unsub is applying some Hermetic heated glass technology to the weapon to make it sharper.” 

Abby raised her eyebrows at the tall lanky man. “Uh, yeah I noticed the glass too and was going to start to do research. Hermetic technology is not that old so the criminal has to have been in aerospace engineering in the last five years.”

“Do you have anything else for us Abbs?” 

“Not yet, Gibbs. But as soon as I do you’ll be the second person to know.” Gibbs indicated with his head that they should leave and let Abby get back to work. As an afterthought, he ran back in the room and kissed her temple, then hurried after the others. He hoped they would get answers sooner, and not later.

* * *

The case was taking a toll on everyone, and Aaron had asked Jessica to keep Jack till it was over. He didn’t want his son to have to go back and forth between houses if they got called in the middle of the night. Their current day had been rough with no leads and no more clues. Both Abby and Garcia were frustrated because they just had no more information they could eek out from their respective sources. 

Spencer and Tony were frustrated because they wanted to get to know each other better, and the case was definitely impinging on that. Morgan, Dave, Emily, and JJ were all frustrated because both Aaron and Gibbs were growling at them, impatient with everyone, the two team leaders left the FBI headquarters, and decided to go talk it out before they took someone’s head off.

Since his place was closer they went back to Aaron’s and ordered in Chinese food. After they both took showers, and cleaned up after the tough day, they sat on the couch eating and talking.

“I have never been this frustrated over a profile before. This is one time that I wish I could call Gideon. Don’t get me wrong, my team is great and Dave is one of the best, but Jason...” Aaron breathed deep and only just realized the old hurt was still there. “He had a way of looking at things that no one else does.” Frustrated, Aaron threw his chopsticks down and leaned back in his chair.

Jethro was watching his lover closely. He already knew that, like him, Aaron put too much pressure on himself, and had a tendency to not let things go. But, he also knew no one was at fault for the lack of intel, it just happened to be that their UnSub was just two steps ahead of them.

“Aaron, you can’t take this on yourself. We’ll get him.” Jethro stated confidently. It was late and they both needed sleep. Jethro had been staying with Aaron so they could work the case even after hours. Bouncing ideas off of each other, and working through the files to see they could find some connection, however tenuous, that they might be missing. Now, though, he knew they needed sleep.

“Come on, let’s go to bed.” Jethro stood and held his hand for Aaron to take. The Unit Chief stood and took Jethro’s hand and let himself be led to the bedroom. They lay there for the longest time in each other’s arms, Jethro rubbing circles along Aaron’s back to try to help him relax.

“Aaron,” Jethro had something important he wanted to say. He knew it was probably bad timing, he was pretty infamous for his bad timing. This he knew he couldn’t keep quiet about anymore. Emotions were always messy for him, and Jethro often decided to avoid them as much as possible. He had three failed marriages to show for it. What had started out as an easy friendship with uncomplicated sex, had slowly turned to so much more. For once in his life, Jethro was going to take a chance, messy emotions and all.

Aaron turned to face his lover, “Jethro, what’s wrong?” He had heard something in the man’s voice that had him worried. He had come to enjoy Jethro’s presence in his life more than he wanted to admit. He didn’t want to let go of what they had, at least not yet, not when Jethro being there had begun to help him heal from his losses.

“Aaron, nothing is wrong, but I want to say something, and I know my timing probably is not the best, but I don’t want to end up in a situation where I have another regret in my life. I,” Jethro took a deep breath, then let it out slowly before he spoke again. “Aaron, I love you.” His heart was pounding because he had no clue how his lover was going to react.

Aaron’s breath caught in his throat and his eyes widened in shock. He knew he had feelings for Jethro, god did he have feelings for him, but he knew he was not in a place to be able to reciprocate those three fateful words. He was afraid to give his heart away to anyone, at least, not right now, not when he was still healing and trying to let go of the guilt he carried over Haley’s death. 

“Jethro, I,” he struggled to form the words that he did want to say, and he knew Gibbs wanted to hear, but he just was not ready. “I can’t, not, not yet.” He furrowed his brow and lifted a shaking hand to stroke Jethro’s cheek, “Please, I don’t want to end this, but I need time.” He looked down at the bed, “Please don’t leave-“ 

Jethro put a finger on Aaron’s lips. “Shh Aaron, I didn’t tell you to make you say it to me, I told you because I needed to. It’s okay, I understand and I can wait.” He leaned in and kissed his lover letting him know everything was alright.

Aaron curled up next to Jethro and pulled the man close to him. He did not want to think about all of this for the rest of the night. He tried to not give in to the overwhelming emotions filling him up; if he did he knew he it would break him, and right now he needed to stay together.

In the morning, Aaron woke to the smell of bacon and he smiled. It was such a mirror of their first night together that it tugged something on his heart. He got up, and put on some pajama pants and a t-shirt, and walked out to his kitchen. When he saw Jethro standing there cooking breakfast it put a smile on his face. Walking up behind the NCIS agent, he wrapped his arms around Jethro’s waist and pulled him in close. 

“Jethro,” he breathed quietly in the other man’s ear as he nuzzled up behind. “I hope you aren’t upset.”

Jetrho turned around in Aaron’s arms and held his lover close, “No, Aaron, I’m not upset. I’m not going anywhere, I promise, and I’m going to keep saying it till you are used to hearing it. Aaron Hotchner, I love you.” Jethro pulled Aaron closer to him and kissed him softly at first, then he slowly deepened the kiss. 

Aaron moaned into the kiss and leaned in further to feel more, his hands wandered over his lover’s back as they deepened their kisses. After a couple of minutes, he pulled gently out of the younger man’s embrace.

“I need to get back to this or we’ll have burnt food,” Jethro teased.

“Okay.” Aaron reluctantly pulled out of the embrace, and went to the table to spread all of the files out and tried to look at them with a fresh eye. He thought of the Boeing Killer, and suddenly had an idea. He wasn’t sure if Garcia would be in yet, but he wouldn’t put it past her. He tried her cell phone first.

“Garcia, I need you to look into the emblems of the different aerospace companies. Also, look into the backgrounds of our victims again, and see if any of them worked, is working, or has applied to work in the industry.” 

“Hotch, I’m not even at my computers. It’s very early in the morning my liege.” She stifled a yawn, “And I need a very big, very strong cup of tea,” She whined into the phone.

“I’m sorry Garcia, I just had an idea. When you get into the office, I want you running down those emblems right away, then do the employment checks.” He tried not to chuckle as she grumbled at him over the phone at what an ungodly early hour it was.

“What are you thinking Aaron?” Jethro came up beside him and looked down at the files.

“The Boeing Killer was leaving marks on the victims in the shape of the Boeing Airlines emblem. Why I didn’t think of this in the first place,” Aaron sighed as his frustrations were starting to get the better of him again.

“Hey, it’s something anyone could have missed. Now we have something. Come on, eat.” Jethro put a plate of food in front of Aaron. The Unit Chief just smiled and shook his head. The words from the night before were pushed down but not forgotten. They had work to do and that’s what he was going to concentrate on.

* * *

They were running after Damien James. Aaron and Jethro were coming at him from behind, Ziva and Morgan from the north, Spencer and Tony from the east, and JJ and Tim from the West. Just when they thought they had him boxed in he ducked into a warehouse. As soon as he did that, he turned and started firing at the agents.

Everyone converged on the warehouse and quickly found places to duck behind.

“Aaron, you and I take the front, why don’t’ we have Tony and Spencer run around to the back and come in that way.” Jethro looked around and saw some open windows on the second floor, “JJ and Tim should be able to take those stairs and get in that way.” Aaron looked to where Jethro was pointing.

Aaron used his radio to contact his team to tell them the plan. When everyone is in position, he gave the signal to breach the warehouse. Aaron stayed high, and Jethro went in low, and Damien fired at them. They ducked behind some crates and waited for the signal from Morgan. 

“Damien James, FBI stop firing and put your hands in the air.” Morgan yelled. The man shot towards Morgan, and the agent fired back, but it was enough of a distraction that Aaron and Jethro were able to quickly get behind Damien. 

Damien swung around when Aaron and Jethro came upon him, and fired wildly towards Jethro who took a shot to his thigh. Morgan and Ziva rushed in, and immediately engaged James as Aaron rushed to Gibbs's side to see how bad the wound was. 

“It looks like a through and through, but dammit he hit your femoral artery, Morgan get me those boxes, someone give me their belts, NOW,” Aaron shouted at his team. “Jethro, lay back.” Jethro didn’t argue, not with the fearful look in Aaron’s eyes. Both Morgan and Spencer handed over their belts and Aaron quickly got them around the leg to help clamp the bleeding. He grabbed Morgan’s hand and dragged him down, and had him clamp down on the rear exit, “Don’t fucking move Morgan. JJ get a damn ambulance here now.” He was barking out orders as he tried to keep calm and do what he had been trained to do. He got his fingers in the wound and clamped them over the bleeding artery.

“Hotch they are on the way, what can I do?” She saw something flash across Aaron’s face and right then she knew, this man meant more to Aaron than just a good friend or colleague.

“Aaron,” Jethro panted gritted his teeth against the pain. “I’m a Marine, this isn’t going to kill me, won’t let it,” He growled out.

“Shut-up Jethro, just…” His jaw was working and he tried not to let tears escape. “Just don’t you fucking die on me, not after what you said.” His breathing was shallow as he tried to concentrate on keeping that artery closed. 

“Aaron, dammit, this is important.” He swallowed hard and tried to stay conscious. “If I get out of this, I want you and Jack, I want you to move in.” He looked at Aaron hopeful.

“We are not talking about this right now Jethro,” Aaron lowered his voice and shook his head at the shocked looks from JJ and Morgan.

“Aaron, I love you dammit, I want you and Jac….” Jethro passed out as the EMT’s finally arrived. 

“Sir, let me clamp the artery, keep your fingers right where they are, that’s it, okay let go now.” Aaron’s breathing was shallow as he had blocked out all the sound around him.

“Sir.” The EMT gently took his hand, “We need to move him now.” Aaron finally came back to his senses and fell back letting the EMT’s take Jethro. He looked down at the blood on his hands and his breathing turned even more shallow.

“No, no, no, no, nononononono, not again.” The panic attack hit him full force. “I can’t do this again,” he kept saying over and over.

‘Hotch, stay with us man, come on you have to calm down. This isn’t the same Hotch.” Morgan was trying to calm his unit chief down when the man surged up off the warehouse floor and stumbled out to one of the SUV’s. He grabbed some of the hand wipes and violently tried to clean his hands while anger, pain and fear all crashed down on him at the same time. He couldn't stop the tears as he got in the vehicle and drove away leaving behind a stunned team.

He arrived at the hospital a short time later and burst through the door. “Leroy Jethro Gibbs, gunshot wound to the upper thigh, would have arrived a few minutes ago where is he?” Aaron demanded of the front desk clerk.

“Just a moment sir,” She looked up the information, “He is in surgery.”

“Waiting room?” He growled out.

“I’m sorry sir, but only family is allowed back.” She said trying to sound compassionate.

“I’m a goddamn federal agent, and he is my partner, now where is the waiting room.” He gave her a very intimidating look and before she asked he pulled out his credentials and showed her.

“Alright, but you need to calm down or they will throw you out of the hospital” She gave him directions and Aaron stalked off. A short-time later both his and Jethro’s team all show up. They were all watching Aaron closely, and after some of them heard Jethro’s confession they all have questions, but no one was willing to approach the Unit Chief. Well no one but Dave that is.

“Not now Dave,” Aaron glared at his best friend as he paced back and forth across the waiting room.

“Aaron, I’ve noticed that you two are close. The last few weeks I’ve seen you smile again, tell me, what’s going on?” Dave stopped the younger man from pacing and studied him.

Aaron closed his eyes a moment and blew out his breath, “It was a few weeks after Haley’s death. I was feeling like everything was crashing down. I needed a night just away from everything, and I found a quiet random bar. Just wanted to sit and not think. Jethro shows up, we’ve known each other for a long time. We met a few years back on a case and we occasionally run into each other. We ah, we went back to his place.” Aaron raised a brow and hoped he didn’t have to explain more.

“Ah.” Dave scrutinized his friend for a moment, “I never knew you swung that way.” 

“It’s not something I advertise. Not ashamed about it, but I’m pansexual. I’m attracted to who a person is, and strong personalities like Jethro’s are a big attraction to me. I admit I was attracted to Jethro long before this, but it was more an appreciation of who he is as a person. I don’t care about gender.” He rubbed a finger across his brow as he stood there trying to tamp down the storm of emotions running through him. “I called him after the Wilson Summers case. We went out for drinks, went back to my apartment. The next day we started going out for coffee every morning. We’ve spent a lot of time together.”

“Aaron, are you in love with him?” Dave could see the conflict on his friends face.

“I can’t be Dave,” He growled out as he stalked out of the waiting room and out the door.

“Rossi, what’s going on?” Morgan asked.

“Aaron is in love with Jethro and is in deep denial. I think him getting shot…” Dave saw the expressions of horror on the teams face.

“Spencer? What’s wrong?” Tony saw the color drain out of the genius’s face. He looked to his team and they shrugged as if to say ‘it's up to you’. Spencer frowned and tried to gather his thoughts.

“Almost 14 months ago an UnSub by the name of George Foyet, or better known as the Boston Reaper, killed Hotch’s ex-wife while he was on the phone with her. We all heard the phone call,” Spencer cleared his throat because he didn’t want to get too emotional, “If Hotch hadn’t gotten there when he did Foyet would have killed his son too.” 

“Oh god, I’m so sorry. So Jethro confessing back there after getting shot,” Tony closed his eyes and ran a hand over his head, “Damn.” Ziva and Tim were both speechless and everyone was standing there in awkward silence.

“If something happens to Jethro, I don’t know if Aaron will be able to come back from that.” Dave was worried more than he wanted to admit. “He doesn’t want to admit he has feelings for Agent Gibbs.” Dave shook his head and worried for his friend.

It was about an hour later when Aaron came back carrying coffee from their coffee shop. He wanted something to hold onto and even though it seemed silly, this was a small gesture of his time with Leroy Jethro Gibbs.

“Aaron, are you okay?” Dave sat next the younger man.

“I don’t know Dave.” He took a long drink of his coffee, clearing his throat of the lump that formed. “I can’t do this again,” he said quietly as bowed his head.

“Aaron I’m going to ask you again, and I want you to be honest with me. Do you have feelings for Agent Gibbs?” Dave closely watched his friend.

“I,” Aaron sat back in the seat he was in and closed his eyes, “I do, I just, I don’t know what they are. I can’t, Dave if he doesn’t make it,” He looked down and tried to calm the raging fear that was churning in his gut.

“Aaron, you can’t think that. You have to think positively,” Dave said as he laid a hand on his friend’s arm.

Aaron didn’t answer him he just sat there and waited. It was several hours later when a doctor finally came out to the waiting room.

“Who here is for Agent Leroy Jethro Gibbs?” The doctor waited while just about everyone in the room stood.

“He’s out of surgery and in recovery. Thanks to the quick thinking of an Agent Hotchner, he’s going to be fine. We had to repair the artery and several nerves and there may be some residual nerve damage, but with proper physical therapy he should be fine.” 

“Thank god,” Aaron closed his eyes and relief swept through him. “When can we see him?” 

“In about a half an hour, they are getting him settled in a room right now.” The doctor smiled softly before leaving them. 

When they were finally allowed to go see the fallen agent they were let in two at a time, after everyone else had their time Aaron went last as he wanted to be alone.

“God Jethro." He grabbed the older man’s hand and held it and finally let some of those emotions he was holding back escape. He silently let tears fall down as he watched his lover sleep. “I don’t know if I can do this Jethro,” He said quietly. 

Aaron was so focused on Jethro that he didn’t hear Dave come up to the room, and stand outside watching. He could see the anguish in his friend and knew just exactly where the man’s head was at. He wanted to say something, but he also was loathe to interrupt. So, for the time being he left them alone and went home while worry settled in his heart for Aaron.   
  
Two days later, Aaron entered Jethro's hospital room bringing him a cup of coffee from their coffee shop.

“Here, I know you probably hate the stuff they serve in this place,” Aaron joked, but the smile didn’t quite reach his eyes.

“Aaron, what’s wrong?” Jethro watched Aaron closely and could tell he had something on his mind.

“Jethro, I can’t do this. I can’t go through that again.” He looked at the man on the bed with such pain in his eyes and Jethro was sorry he helped put that there, “I,” Aaron’s breath hitched as he lifted his face to look Jethro in the eye, “I care about you, I do, but I can’t do this Jethro, I can’t let those feelings out again. I’m sorry.” Aaron closed his eyes and took a deep breath to push down those feelings he was trying very hard not to acknowledge that he had for Jethro Gibbs.

“Aaron, what are you trying to tell me?” Jethro sat up in bed as best he could with an elevated leg.

“Jethro, please, I just can’t be with you. I can’t feel all this for you and then lose you I can’t lose another person.” Aaron surged out of his chair, violently threw his cup away and stalked out of the hospital. 

Jethrovwas trying to reach the phone when Tony walked in, “Boss, what are you doing?” He ran over and helped the older man back on the bed.

“Get your hands off, DiNozzo.” Jethro slapped at Tony’s hands as he was trying to settle the man back down.

“Boss, you okay? Did something happen?” Tony sat down in a chair next to Gibbs’s bed.

“Give me your phone, DiNozzo,” Jethro growled out as he held out his hand. Tony gave him the phone and wondered just what had happened. Jethro quickly dialed and waited.

“Aaron, call me back dammit. You can’t just leave like that.” Jethro hung up and threw his head back in frustration.

“Gibbs? What happened?” Tony was worried about the expression on his boss's face.

Jethro grabbed the pen and little notebook on the stand next to his bed and scribbled something on it.

“Grab Morgan, go to that address, and drag Aaron’s ass back here. He cannot just leave with that lame ass excuse.” Jethro shoved the paper at Tony.

“Boss I don’t think...“ Tony was cut off from whatever he was going to say by the look Gibbs was giving him. “Right, I’ll just go now.” Tony walked out of Gibbs's room to go find Morgan.

“Hey, Derek,” He saw the darker man standing by the coffee machine looking like he wanted to curse at it.

“DiNozzo, what’s up?” Derek eyed the machine with derision. Even he knew how bad the coffee was.

“Gibbs asked me to do something, he ah, he wanted us to go to your Chief’s house and try to bring him back.”

“What do you mean? Isn’t he in there?” Derek looked confused.

“No, when I came in Gibbs demanded my phone, left a message with Hotch and then got really upset. I have no idea what’s going on.” Tony just shrugged his shoulders as he tried to comprehend what was going on.

They quickly got to Aaron’s apartment and knocked. No one answered, they knocked again. Frowning Morgan took out the spare key that Aaron had given him for emergencies, and opened the door. Raising his gun he stepped carefully inside with DiNozzo following behind. They quickly cleared the apartment and Morgan instantly knew something was off. He went into Aaron’s bedroom and opened his closet. His go bag and suitcase were gone and it looked like a section of his clothes were gone also. He looked in drawers and also saw they had been emptied. The bathroom was the same. When they got to Jack’s room, the picture was pretty clear that Aaron was gone and taken Jack. 

“Hey Morgan, look.” Morgan made his way back to DiNozzo and saw that he was holding up a letter to Gibbs.

“Dammit, what the hell is Hotch doing?” Morgan shook his head as they made their way back out of the apartment. Locking the door, they went back to his car then drove back to the hospital in silence..

Tony took the letter and with a sad heart he walked into Gibbs's room and handed it to him.

“He wasn’t there Gibbs. Clothes were gone for both him and his son.” Tony pressed his lips together and didn’t know what else to say.

Jethro frowned as he held the letter in his hand and figured out that Aaron had this planned. He didn’t say anything as he held onto that envelope trying to gain control over the rising anger inside him. He was angry that Aaron just left with no explanations. He had a feeling he knew what was in the letter, which made him not want to read it. Thankfully, Tony sensed he wanted to be alone so he turned and walked out of the room. Jethro was glad that his subordinate chose not to say anything to him. 

Jethro closed his eyes a moment before opening the letter.

_ Jethro _ ,

_ There are so many things I know I should say but I just can’t. I thought I could handle it, this thing between us, but you getting hurt, holding your life in my hands like that I just couldn’t. I know I’m being a coward, I know that, but this has all happened too soon, and I need distance. Please don’t try to find me. Have a good life Jethro, you will always be important to me. I will never regret a moment of the time we spent together, but I just can’t be the person you want or need me to be.  _

_ Thank you for that night, for being someone I could turn to when I felt like I was drowning. It will always be special to me. You saw me like no one else could. _

_ Love, Aaron. _

Jethro closed his eyes and cursed under his breath because he couldn’t get out of bed. He wasn’t going to leave it like this, though. He was going to find Aaron, or at least have Abby find Aaron. As soon as he was able to walk again, he was going to fight for what he wanted, what he knew Aaron wanted, but was too afraid to admit to.

* * *

THREE MONTHS LATER

 

“Abby, are you sure about this?” Gibbs asked as he looked at the information she had given him.

“Absolutely Gibbs. I checked and double checked. He’s using a different name, but…” Abby bit her lip as she furrowed her brow.

“Abbs, what?” Gibbs barked at her. He knew he had been terrible to be around the last few months, and he was still using a cane, which made his mood even worse. He was only at Abby’s lab because she had called him and told him she had information.

“I called Spencer and had him go over the information, and he verified that is a name that Agent Hotchner would use.”

Gibbs took the information and frowned.

“What the hell is he doing on Nantucket Island?” he growled to himself. He started to turn away, but then quickly bussed a kiss against Abby’s temple. “Thank you, Abbs.”

“Miss you around here.”

“Hmm, and I know you’ve been giving Tony a hard time. He’s a good man, and a good leader Abbs. I don’t want to hear anymore that you are trying to make him like me. No one should be like me.” Gibbs didn’t wait for an answer as he walked away and thought about arrangements that would take him where he needed to go.

* * *

Aaron stood in the middle of the completed bathroom and smiled. When he had bought the Lighthouse with the cottage three months ago he had no idea what he was in for. He liked the work, though, it let him forget for a time everything he had left behind. 

The first thing he had done after he bought the place was to gut it. He ripped out the kitchen, tore up old wood and paneling, tore out both bathrooms, and took a couple of the walls back to just their beams. It was hard work, but it exhausted him enough that he fell on his bed in the rented trailer and slept. Thoughts of the people, especially Jethro, that he had left behind were pushed from his mind. There were some days he couldn’t stop the pain, and those were days he pushed himself harder, and worked longer. He still ran, but this time it was on the beach instead of a part of a neighborhood. There were days all he wanted to do was run, and empty his mind. Aaron considered getting a dog after the cottage and Lighthouse were finished. Then there were those days that he couldn’t sleep, that thoughts of Jethro wouldn’t leave his mind, or his heart. He thought getting away, beginning again would help, but it hadn’t. So many times he had picked up the phone to call, only to hang-up and never say the things he wanted to say. 

Jack was loving the adventure of it all. He was still too young to understand everything, but Aaron knew he was soon going to start asking questions. He wasn’t sure if he was going to be ready for that, only time would tell.

So far he had replaced the kitchen, which took about three weeks of hard constant work. He had someone helping him, and as he finished each section he had a local contractor come out and inspect his work to make sure he had done it all right. It wasn’t hard, and the few weekend classes he had taken helped immensely. He also remembered a lot of it from work he had done on the house he had shared with Haley. It was the sale of that house that let him purchase the Lighthouse, and use it to help with the renovations.

He was doing the hardest rooms first, kitchen and bathrooms. After three months, he had those three rooms, the small dining room and the beginnings of combining the front room to part of the Lighthouse. He was going to install a swinging door with a new door jamb. The room that was the living room he was going to turn into Jack’s playroom, and the large ground floor of the Lighthouse, he was going to turn into the living room. The second floor of the Lighthouse had an office that he would do last. He was going to make that into an office and library. It was big enough for it. He had even gotten permission from City Hall to renovate and reinstall the lights to make a working Lighthouse again. That part he would get help from the Coast Guard. One of their engineers had already come out and outlined an automated system that Aaron wouldn’t have to worry about touching, and the Guard engineers would come out every three months to make sure it was still working properly. 

He had plans also for the Guardhouse that was set off and to the side. He was going to renovate that also, make it a nice rental space. He could rent to vacationers, or even to the Coast Guard on occasion when they might need a place to bunk down. He had a lot of land surrounding the lighthouse that went right into a private beach with a small pier and landing. Aaron considered buying a boat that he could take Jack out on during the weekends when the weather was good. He hadn’t been sailing in a long time and a part of him missed it.

Aaron shook himself out of his thoughts and went back to inspecting his bathroom. He wanted to reflect the area, and he had a love of the old fashioned. The wall with the pedestal sink he had installed beadboard on the bottom half and painted it white. The top half of the wall he painted a nice reddish brown to complement the teakwood floor that he installed. The deep clawfoot tub with the freestanding shower head was something he had always wanted, but Haley always wanted modern. The light beige tile that he put around the wall with the large window, he smiled at and felt proud that he had done that. The last touch was the darker beige wall opposite the one with the sink. All the colors and textures complemented each other and made for a warm and inviting space. Even the storage rack was of painted wrought iron. Stepping out, he took a deep breath and felt a sense of satisfaction.

His contractor was going to be there later that morning to inspect the two bathrooms he had finished. The other was Jack’s. He had gone blues and greens, and put in a bathtub/shower combo. The curtain was Blue’s Clues and all his towels were whimsical with Jack’s favorite shows. The floor was a blue swirl pattern that Jack loved. The room screamed kid, but it warmed Aaron’s heart to give his son something that was wholly his.

He had wanted to get the hardest rooms finished first, then he was going to work on the bedrooms. That wasn’t going to take as long, the walls had still been good, but he had taken up the floors that had become warped. After resealing the concrete, he was going to lay bamboo wood wood floors in both rooms, but add lots of colorful rugs in Jack’s. 

The knock on the door didn’t surprise him as he was waiting for Stan Williams, his contractor, to show up and sign off on the work he had finished. Jack was plunked down on the patio in a chair with some books, where Aaron could come out and keep an eye on him. He was lucky in that Jack was good and stayed where he was told to stay. He had a local teen that came in the morning before school and helped, then after she would take Jack to the beach where she would watch him and do her homework. The rest of the time Jack followed Aaron around the house, trying to help. The only times he had to go outside was when Aaron used some of the more dangerous equipment. 

Smiling and feeling accomplished at what he had finished, Aaron opened the door, and his heart stopped. Standing in front of him wasn’t Stan, but one Leroy Jethro Gibbs.

“Jet,” Aaron’s heart raced as he stared at the man.

“Hello Aaron.”

“I asked…”

“I know what you asked Aaron, but it’s bullshit and you know it.”

Swallowing past the lump in his throat, he stepped aside and waved the man inside.

“What are you doing here Jethro?”

Gibbs limped in, leaning on the cane, he looked around.

“Doin’ all this yourself?” Aaron knew the man was deflecting, and for the moment he would give it to him.

“Yes.”

“You could use help.”

Aaron closed his eyes and walked to the kitchen and pulled a bottle of water from the fridge. He took a long pull before leaning against the sink and looked back at Jethro.

“I’ve been doing fine.”

Jethro moved into the kitchen and Aaron couldn’t stop staring at the cane and the memories of that day flooded his mind. He turned away and gripped the sink, closing his eyes he tried to stem the tide. He knew what this was, he knew he was suffering from PTSD from everything that had happened over the last couple of years. 

“Aaron,” Jethro moved to stand next to him. “Talk to me.”

Aaron huffed out a laugh as he turned to look at Jethro.

“We are the two worst people when it comes to talking.”

“Maybe it’s time we changed that, or tried to. I’ve been told that I’ve been a worse bastard than normal since you left.”

Aaron grabbed his water, then opened the fridge and grabbed another one for Jethro, then indicated with his head he was heading outside. He didn’t look back to see if Jethro followed, he assumed that if he really did want to talk, the man would follow.

There were two Adirondack chairs with an umbrella between them and a small table where the waters could be set down on. Aaron sat first, he could still keep an eye on Jack, who had followed when the two men walked outside, and was sitting in the sand and playing.

“New York, almost two years ago, there was a hell of a case. A terror cell we were after set off a bomb in the SUV that I was in with a colleague. She had been thrown violently from the vehicle and when I became coherent again I could see her, just lying there. I ran over and checked her over. She couldn’t move. I called out for the EMT’s and,” Aaron closed his eyes and swallowed the lump in his throat. “They were following the protocols we had given them. I held her life, literally in my hands. We finally got to the hospital, and the damn ambulance driver that helped me, drove a bomb into the emergency bay because of me. When it was all over, Kate died.”

Aaron wiped a hand across his eyes stemming the tears that wanted to leak out.

“Then you had to deal with Foyet not long after.”

Aaron nodded and kept looking out towards the ocean. He wasn’t ready to look at Jethro yet. He was saved from further conversation when the contractor showed up, and Aaron led him to each bathroom, letting Stan check them over for any possible problems.

It took two hours for Stan to go over the bathroom renovations and declared them good to go. Aaron saw him out, and when he moved back to the chairs he saw Jack cuddled up on the chair with Jethro.

“it’s almost time for lunch, would you...do you want to stay?”

Jethro looked up and a tiny crooked smile formed.

“I’d like that.”

Aaron ended up making chicken salad sandwiches, pasta salad, and some fruit. The three of them sat at the small kitchen nook and ate in silence. When done, Sheryl showed up and took Jack with her to towards the beach, leaving Jethro and Aaron alone. Aaron picked up the thread of their conversation as they sat at the table.

“When you were there, bleeding out in my hands...trying to keep your stubborn ass alive, I lost it. I couldn’t do it, can’t do it anymore. I care about you, Jet, I do, but I can’t be there if you’re still with NCIS.”

“And you think I was okay with you going after dangerous serial criminals? We both worked dangerous jobs Aaron. The chance for something to happen…”

“Is very high.” Aaron looked out the window at Jack. His son was happy, carefree, the change and Aaron being there all the time had done the both of them good. “I took the retirement package from the Bureau. Sold the house, put some in a trust for Jack. Cashed out my 401, and cut all ties. It was too much, too fast.” Aaron turned and looked at Jethro, “I didn’t expect you.”

Jethro chuckled and tapped the table as he shook his his head.

“And I didn’t expect you, Aaron. Not at all.”

“So, what are we going to do about it?”

* * *

One Year Later

 

“Stop fidgeting.” Jethro snapped at Aaron, who kept shifting nervously. “They’ll be here.”

Aaron nodded his head as he scooped up Jack and held him close. The Lighthouse, with Jethro’s help, had been finished quickly. The swinging door that led from the bungalow to the actual Lighthouse was perfect, and exactly what Aaron had envisioned.

“Just nervous.”

Jethro cupped the side of Aaron’s face and smiled before leaning in to kiss him.

“I know.”

While the two men still had their quiet moments, they had learned to talk to each other. Jethro had told Aaron he had to retire, his leg was as healed as it was going to get. He needed to be careful so as not to pull on the muscles and tendons that had been stitched back together.

Aaron sighed and smiled back. The year hadn’t been easy, but Jethro was a stubborn jackass. He had moved into the smaller bungalow, the one Aaron wanted to turn into a rental, and Jethro helped with that. They took it slow, dates, working on the Lighthouse, setting up the greenhouse Aaron had helped to design that melded nicely with the architecture of the Lighthouse. He set it up to grow herbs, chilies, and a couple of other vegetables. The outside land was part beach, and part scrub grasses. With the help of a local nursery, hardy plants had been picked out that would work perfectly for them. 

Nights were sometimes spent watching a game, or some movie they had both wanted to see. Jethro would sometimes take Jack out on the boat that he had been built in-between helping with the renovations. On weekends, the three of them could be seen sailing just past the Island. 

Sex took them both a while to bring back into the relationship, and only happened when they were both ready. Life happened, and Aaron learned to let it happen.

The knock at the front door had Aaron taking a deep breath. He then walked over and opened it after putting Jack down.

Standing there on his porch was Tony and Spencer, the new rings on their fingers had Aaron’s heart swelling.

“Come in, Tony.” Aaron gave him a quick hug, then the man went right to Jethro. “Spencer,” Aaron’s eyes turned soft as he pulled the man in for a better hug. “I have missed you.”

“It’s only been a couple of months Hotch. You saw us at the wedding.”

“I know, but I’m glad to see you anyway.” Spencer’s eyes softened and he gently squeezed Aaron’s arm, knowing what it was the man meant.

A few moments later Morgan, JJ with Will and Henry, Dave, and Emily all showed up.

“Couldn’t have found someplace easier to get to, could you?” Dave teased as he pulled Aaron in for a hard hug. “You look good.”

“Thank you. If you want to fight Morgan for the grill, you better get back there.”

Dave chuckled and shook his head. Aaron greeted the rest of the old team, then it was tours for everyone. After a long ‘discussion’ it was agreed that Jethro would be in charge of the bar-b-que.

Henry and Jack ran off, with Will following after them to watch them. The doorbell rang again, and this time it was the rest of the NCIS team. Ducky, Abby, Tim and Jimmy with his girlfriend Breena, and Ziva were all there.    
  
“Come on in, Jet is out back manning the barbeque grill.” He got hugs from Abby and Ziva, a smile and squeeze to the arm from Tim and a big smile from Ducky. Breena smiled brightly as she pulled him into her arms, as did Jimmy. They both commented on the bungalow and Lighthouse before wandering out to find a beer. Ducky stayed behind a moment.   
  
“You have been very good for Jethro, Aaron. I’m gad that the two of you could reconcile. When you danced at Anthony’s wedding, we all thought you were going to propose yourself.” Ducky smiled wryly at the blush creeping up on Aaron’s face.   
  
“We are no where near ready for that Ducky. I think we are taking it slow, but we’re happy.”

“And that is all I want for you both. I think I’ll wander out and find the man himself.” Ducky patted Aaron’s arm then walked out to the back to find his friends. Aaron was slightly startled when he felt a bump to his side and he looked to see JJ standing next to him.

“Wow, you did all this by yourself Hotch?” JJ asked as she slid an arm around his waist. Smiling he wrapped an arm around her shoulders and pulled her close.

“Mostly, then when Jet showed up one day, we both did it.”

“It’s beautiful. You look happy, Hotch.”

Aaron looked around the bungalow, and at the people that were there, talking and laughing with each other. A smile graced his lips, and the nervousness he had felt earlier fell away.

“I am Jayje.”

“Good.” She reached up and gave him a peck on the cheek, then left to spend time with Jack and Henry. Spencer came up and handed him a beer.

“You know, when you took retirement I almost didn’t believe it. I never saw you leaving the Bureau, but after Tony, I get it. I just wish you had let us in, let us help you Hotch. We missed you.”

“I admit, I’ve missed it too, but I didn’t want to end up like Gideon. I knew I wasn’t handling things well. It was all too much. But, I promise to stay in touch.”

“You better. And, thank you for being my best man. I never got a chance to say that.”

“I was honored, Spencer.”

“Hold onto him. I may not get the two of you, but whatever it is, it looks good on you.” Spencer pursed his lips in a smile, clinked his beer with Aaron’s then went off to find his husband. Aaron swung his eyes over to Jethro who was joking with Morgan as they debated the best way to cook the burgers on the grill. He heard Jack’s laughter, and felt the love from their friends. For the first time in too long to remember, Aaron was happy.

Jethro walked over, limping a little because he was trying not to use the cane as much, and slipped an arm around Aaron’s waist.

“Hey you.”

“Hey back.” Aaron dipped his head and kissed his partner, his heart full. “Thank you for finding me, and never giving up on me.”

“You were just a little lost. Sometimes we need to get lost to find what we want from life.”

“I should just get used to expecting the unexpected, shouldn’t I?”

“Oh, you very much should.” Jethro chuckled as he moved back to the grill and continued cooking. Aaron smiled knowing his life was very, very good. 


End file.
